Never pack anything you would be devastated to lose or have stolen.

Stop worrying about the kids. And you don’t have to call them every other day, either.

Don’t hang your purses on the restaurant chair back.

Dukoral really works. That said, always pack anti-diarrhea medications and carry them on the plane.

Spring for the upgrade. Your credit card will never know the difference.

Pack Tylenol 3s. You don’t need to pay a doctor to tell you you’ve sprained your ankle.

Ask your doctor about free travel inoculations before you pay money at a travel clinic.

No bat-eating. Also, don’t eat anything that isn’t already dead. Except yogurt and kimchi, etc.

It’s OK to just stand and stare at how beautiful something is for a few minutes.

Driving in a foreign land? Never take your eyes off the road.

If you ever find yourself feeling superior to someone who doesn’t speak English, fuck yourself off.

Never take photographs of children unless you ask the parents first.

Be kind to animals abroad. They may not have the best life.

Don’t be an asshole. Similarly, don’t call out others for being assholes, because you never know if they may be dangerous.

People-watching cures travel boredom instantly. And it’s free!

Some hotels let you hang out at their pool for a small fee, especially in areas with a high density of tourists.

Do you think you will enjoy high tea? Of course you will!

You don’t have to sleep at fancy hotels to enjoy them. Pop by for a drink at cocktail hour.

Keep travel expenses down by opting for street fare. Some cities have the best food trucks.

Never ever touch the mini bar. Unless you really, really want to.

Skip expensive hotel laundry service and Google the nearest laundromat instead. (Bonus: You can pack lighter.)

The best day to fly? Tuesday, because there is less demand for seats and the prices are lower.

The sweet spot for buying a domestic plane ticket is 55 days in advance.

A travel steamer will save you from cursing at the seen-better-days iron and ironing board in the hotel-room closet.

Sometimes saying “make it a double, please” just feels really right.

Select the red-eye flight to shave a night—or two—of hotel rooms off the bill.

Yes, there’s definitely time for a nap. Isn’t there always? Just get up a bit earlier.

Eliminate pocket fishing at airport security by putting everything in your jacket and nothing in your pants first thing in the morning. Pack your belt in the carryon. Wear loafers.

Keep a travel journal so you can share details of your trip with friends down the road.

Don’t over-pack! Leave space in your suitcase for souvenirs. Swiss chocolate and Limoncello are very tempting!

Learn a few key phrases of the language of the country you’re visiting. Know what their police force equivalent of “Freeze!” is.

Choose a destination according to your passions—a food tour in France, a soccer tournament in Barcelona, camping in Switzerland.

The travel agent is right. You’ll be way more comfortable in first class.

Always travel with a small amount of the currency of the country you’re visiting. What if there’s no bank machine at the airport or the exchange kiosk is closed?

Sometimes you just have to have lunch twice.

The moment you see an airline offering a sale, wait until the next afternoon to hunt for a fare, because all the airline’s competitors will be trying to match the previous day’s sale price.

You deserve those little lacy mats they put on the floor at turn-down.

Beat jetlag by conditioning yourself to your destination’s time as quickly as possible upon landing. If it’s midnight, go to bed (maybe with a pill). If it’s morning, have breakfast.

There’s a spa out there with your name on it.